Top of tha mornin' to ya! Well, okay. It's not morning there and it's almost really morning here anymore either. But what ever.
Sometimes I feel very unreal. I mean, I just (two months ago, whoa what happened) moved to the other side of the planet into a very different country and somehow I don't feel different really. When I take care of the kids, well, I take care of the kids. It feels kinda the same as if I was in school. It was something that had to be done and then it ended at some point and I go home. Except that I don't really go home, 'cause I already am home. But I don't really know if I actually call this place home... I mean, it is not home in the same sense as my "real" home in Finland is, but it is a home in the kinda sense as a friends house is a home. It's not really the same thing, because when you're at a friend's place, you know at some point you will have to leave and go home. It's temporary, sort of. So what I think my brain doesn't really realize is that this home I have here isn't really temporary. (I mean it is, but it will be temporary for the next 10 months, so it would maybe be better if I didn't consider it temporary......)
But that's not actually what I meant to talk about when I said I feel unreal. Well, it's a part of it, but feeling like I'm just gonna wake up in a few days and take the bus home isn't why i feel unreal, even if it connects to it. So what I was going to say was this.
My days are very similar: wake up, drive kids to school and watch Kaija for the morning (or on Monday and Wednesday, sleep in), pick up kids from school around noon, lunch, bath, give them milk and then it's nap time. Hope that they sleep for a good two hours. Sometimes Leila refuses to sleep and instead she reads or draws or plays with this silly Barbie-computer she has. Once a week we bake something. Kids wake up at four, plusminus 20 minutes, get a snack and we go outside, possibly to the park if the girls have been good and I spend the rest of the day glancing at my clock every two minutes wondering when the parents get home. When they get home it's dinner and I am officially off the clock, but my brain doesn't really realize it and I feel like I can't really leave the room yet and so I usually wound up hanging in the living room, half watching the kids, until seven when bedtime preparations start. Kaija goes to bed first and Leila after an hour, round eight. And I still feel kinda obligated to stay in the main floor (my room is in the basement) so I just hang awkwardly, doodling something or, if my computer is upstairs, tumblring or what not, until I feel like I have to get away and hastily excuse myself after awkwardly making sure there's nothing I should do/know about the next day.
But that's not really what I wanted to talk about either....
ANYWAY. I get downstairs. It's me time. I've been working for twelve hours (though working working for 10) and I just can't anymore. So I watch TV. Because some routines should be preserved, and watching TV from eight to ten (and sometimes twelve, oops) is one of them. And that is really what I meant, because when I watch TV, I am super invested. Anyone who has watched anything with me knows this. I comment all the frikking time. (Even when I watch it alone, seriously I comment on the things under my breath like muttering them to myself.. Anyone who sees me watching TV by myself must think I'm crazy, haha...) And because I am this invested in the world, characters and story of the things I watch, I sometimes lose the sense of reality. And after I've stopped watching it takes a while until I realize who, what and where I am. And then I know I should be in bed, because I have eight hours until I need to be driving the kids to school. And in those moments I swear I am unreal. I don't even know.
Do you ever get a feeling like that?
On a different note, tumblr is awesome, check out what I found there. Huh? HUH? How awesome is that?? I totally want a shirt like that. And I am totally getting a shirt like that! But I can't really decide... I was thinking Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Grimms' Fairytales, The Origin of Species, The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, The Bible (haha also The Torah would be cool), I mean, there's so many great books! The shirts are like 35$, so I should narrow that down a bit, to at least two.... Then I could get the totes (haha what a word, I mean a bag), 'cause they are cheaper. Would you want one? I could totally order one for you as well, and send it to you with the Christmas presents I hopefully remember to buy. Wouldn't it be awesome? Ooh, I could get the Origin of Species and the Bible, haha that would be great.
But yeah, that's all from me now. Tata!
Pie out.
P.S. I totally forgot it's Fathers' Day! I'm sorry! I remembered it yesterday.... But happy Fathers' Day dad! I miss you! <3
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